mangoes & magnesium
A day like today feels long and heavy.
It’s too cold outside to enjoy, rather, to sit and become supple to the elements. Apathy drains my spirit. Feeling moved to work with what I have—I deep clean my space. Days flow by too easily. Another egg cracked, yolk flowing. Sink on, laundry folded. It feels like a war against myself to keep moving. Keep going.
I bring myself outside, just to witness the weather. The terror of our rights being stripped from us causes a desire to hermit. A fear beyond the weather. A fear generated from years and years. It’s all collapsing, on our front doorstep. What is next? What to do but worry?
It’s forced me to cave in. Nurture myself and my community. And what does that mean for me today? A simple setup from a collection of what’s in my house. Mangoes from my mom. Magnesium from my cabinet. And a look inside: What is it that I can bring to my community? How can I be of service, and share my love? It all feels a little hopeless, and I’ve been wanting to hug and hold my friends closer. Make art and feel the deep rage. Contribute in ways that feel meaningful and bring support to immigrant communities.
Melancholy, a dark color shrouds me. What to do, but hear the sounds. The cries, the calls, the needs. How is this the land of the free. We’re going back in time, or were we always here. I sit and soak in all the stories have to bring. Clawing, festering, fearing, IM SO MAD. These people are innocent. What more torment can this city take. People came here for newness. Freedom. Love. A better life. And this is what they are brought upon? Reader, what is it in the villain that inspires them to strike? How can stories be re-written right before our eyes?
Another bite, a sip of warmth. Settling in, all I can do is breathe. Take all I can for the day, and rush to the next waking moment. Showing up and being there is all I can hope for. Bringing in my skills, and connecting people together. Remembering just for a second, who it is I am and how to
And it’s just another day. More numb and cold,
